Contest "Girlfriend for a Gnome" (story) - Maladiq - (3/5)
| The night was as silent as some undisclosed publishers when asked about a new patch or news about an undisclosed game: only growling and snorting pierced the stillness of the dark, Grmplk and Grmplkskaia were making sweet love upon the floor of the cave. Then, as fast as their passion was unleashed, Grmplk fell asleep after 23 seconds of agonizing pleasure. His girlfriend rolled her eyes and started picking her toes. The night was now completely silent. Then, in the distance, Grmplkskaia heard the painful screams of a nameless, unknown hero getting his ass kicked by some wild boars. ‘Hooney!’ she mumbled… No response so she put a finger into Grmplk’s nose and repeated the call. He twitched and growled a ‘yes’. ‘Oh, dear’ she continued, ‘did you know that my cousin ran off with a sting rat?’ You don’t saaaay…’ yawned her boyfriend. ‘How could she do that?!’ ‘A…. haaa…’ ‘I wonder she is doing now!’ ‘Sleeepin… maybee…’ he yawned again ‘Oh, I give up, go back to sleep. That’s all you know how to do’ Minutes after minutes passed and Grmplkskaia started getting madder and madder seeing Grmplk’s happy mug. ‘Honey!’ she called him while stuffing a piece of wood under his toe nail. ‘Whaaaaaat?’ he desperately cried, without even opening his eyes. ‘What are you dreaming about?’ ‘Nothing…. About you…. And me…. And uuuus….’ ‘You’re lying to me!’ ‘Would I lie to you?’ ‘No you wouldn’t… just that I didn’t get my D&E purse for last Christmas… Or a total of 1 minute of sex this year… And you promised li…li..li’ she started crying ‘liiitlee gnooomeees.’ Her scream woke Grmplk from his sleep as it reminded him of what he loved so dearly about her: the pure, cristal snorting which reminded him of a drowning person, the phlegm which so beautifully reflected the moon light while rushing out of her nose. ‘Damn’ he thought ‘I should leave those chickens from the farm alone, she deserves it’ he told himself as he felt a glorious hard on. He took off his jacket and revealed a beautiful member covered in moles filled with puss. She did the same. ‘Damn, now I remember why I like chickens so much’, he thought as he watched her pseudo phallus getting bigger and bigger. But there was no stopping to it. Their wild screams filled the night and nothing was as beautiful or glorious as their orgasmic snorting. Then, suddenly… ‘That’s the WRONG hole!’ he screamed in anger. She was laughing: ‘Well, you got the wrong hole so many times that I thought I should do it once. And it is so fuuun!’. But Grmplk was not thinking about his sore ass anymore. Their jackets had their pockets open and empty. It seems that the nameless hero managed to escape the boars and instead found 2 jackets to loot and some bizarre porn show. He turned towards his girlfriend and started strangling her madly. It was only HER fault that he lost all the hard collected shiny stuff. And now… the gnomes lost their last female. The end. Epilogue: somewhere out there is a nameless hero with his pockets full of shiny useless stuff. |
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